Where is the line between kindness towards others, and disrespecting your own self?
What brings you joy? Focus on it with your self-talk
Like Water On Stone, Your Kind Inner Words Shape You
The way you treat yourself is a good indication of what your default inner voice sounds like
I used to practice very little self-care. It's like I didn't think I was worth the effort. The list of how I was irresponsible with myself was very long indeed. My self-talk was as poor as the way I treated myself.
Sarah Peyton writes in Your Resonant Self that if you're not sure what your inner voice sounds like, you can get a good idea if you look at your self-care. "Even if you can't hear this voice, we might guess what its tone is form the way we treat ourselves or from the way we are thinking about others," she writes.
As I've started turning to myself with more self-warmth, and paying attention to what I'm saying inside, self-care has become way easier. I don't have to force it anymore. It just happens naturally.
An amazing thing happens when you start to transform your self-talk. There's an effect that is felt throughout your whole being. Parts of you will start to relax for the first time ever. Parts of you will want to laugh more. Parts of you will want adventure.
Parts of you will also want to take better care of this person who has been entrusted to you: yourself. Whatever improved self-care looks like for you, that's the direction you'll start going gently, without forcing it, like a current that has suddenly started flowing in a new direction.
Perhaps you'll give yourself the gift of more sleep and rest. Perhaps you'll choose real friends. Perhaps you'll decide that it's time to stop doing something that doesn't feel good anymore. Perhaps you'll give yourself a break.
I'm not saying this will be easy. I'm saying that you'll be pulled to do it, and it will feel right, and worthwhile.
Thank you for reading!
Be well!
Maryse